Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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