So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
