i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize