yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
