dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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