i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
