is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
