how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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