I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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