I need help removing her.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize