Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Randomize
