kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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