Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
