she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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