He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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