I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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