you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
