dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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