Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Randomize
