Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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