You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
