Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
