If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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