Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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