i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
