ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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