everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Randomize
