Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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