So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
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