Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
