Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm both gender and math confused
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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