Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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