Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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