We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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