so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
