If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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