The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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