Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
My ass is underappreciated
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
