We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
