There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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