when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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