NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
