scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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