either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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