3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
