is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
