Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
