i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
