I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i wish my penis had a tongue
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
