On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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