Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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