"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
