So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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