But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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